Around 12,240 hours. Roughly 510 days.
It’s been exactly 17 months. The amount of time it’s been since I made the decision to leave my marriage. My 19-month marriage since we’re talking numbers today.
That decision to leave was a strikingly easy one to make. All it took was this: separating the idea of my life from what it actually was. One second of realization, a few words of utter truth… then I saw clearly. I saw it. All that it was.
My mind was made and there was no other choice have thought through. No other options. I knew what I had to do.
I’ve often been called impulsive. I make fast decisions. Surely this has been quite so in many instances. I’m a type-A person so I like to believe it originates in my personality. To get things done. To feel productive. To have order… and, to have gotten there quickly I may have skipped a few steps that, at that time, that I didn’t feel were valuable. Those steps could have included a lot of time…. hours, days, months.
Many people who care about me know this heavy flaw of mine. There’s no denying it if you look at my track record. I realize this about myself.
Though, not all my impulsive decisions are bad ones… Impulsivity usually connotes something negative. I recently described my view as “quickly calculated decisions.”
However, I know much learning and growing can come from those impulsive decisions whether good or bad. Any transition takes time.
Like these past 17 months. 734,400 seconds of that exact learning and growing. And healing. Lots of healing. That slim-timed decision resulted in thorough time to transition.
That time-clock hasn’t stopped either. I’m still learning and growing. Healing? I’ve gotten pretty far there. Remember, ‘divorce is like a scar.’